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I don't watch a lot of daytime TV but when I catch Ellen I usually end up enjoying myself. She had this nut on today pimping home remedies for every superficial problem we as shallow North America women could ever have! From natural serotonin producers that will help us all stop eating! To rubbing coffee grounds on your butt to firm up that saggy caboose, to my personal fave, wearing bright red bathing suits because when we were monkey's our girl bits lit up in red to tell the males we needed to be romped. Wow! Thanks for such twisted beauty tips! All the while this crazy bitch looks like she's been huffing her homemade serotonin spray she's so blitz on her own happiness. But the whole while she's tweeking on smiles and rubbing coffee grounds on a maniquins glute Ellen looks like shes from another planet and hits the bottle of tequila still on the counter from some other twisted beauty experiment. Priceless.

Bonus 'cause Ellen's new haircut is sexy. O_O

On an unrelated note, I went to the grocery store recently and thought I saw what was a folded cheque on the floor, but when I picked it up it was a bit of discarded store signage. Signage that only raised more questions than it answered! Lookit this!

cut for the fine print & a conspiracy theory! )

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